so you think you're LIKE me? the only similarities are DNA.

alright.. so i was thinking about how my mom seems to be doing the same shit as my sister used to be doing (she may still be doing it- i've just learned to ignore it?) and attempting to be a stacy jr. my mom is so dense that she doesn't realize older people are SUPPOSED to look UP to people OLDER than them (and/or in higher spots of authority). IF my mom was so much like me- SHE'D BE MORE FUCKIN RACIALLY PLURALISTIC. she may try to defend herself by using the argument, "BUT YOU'RE MEXICAN! I WAS ABLE TO REPRODUCE WITH A MEXICAN! YOUR GRANDMA ALSO HAS INDIAN IN HER! I CAN'T BE RACIST!" wrong.. as usual.. YOU have always had this fear of black people. i'm MORE racially pluralistic than YOU and all of my damn family on your side (except joe of course, he realizes that people are DIFFERENT and that God made EVERYONE DIFFERENT and UNIQUE). it's pricks like YOU that were the cause of philando castile's death. i know damn well that YOU would NEVER volunteer your time to support a black man who was killed by police. you have "better" things to do.. right? spoken like a true white supremacist. which just ONE look at me and i could NEVER be considered one of those.. nor would i EVER want to be. i'm more intelligent than that. i know that you and the rest of my damn ignorant family members are gonna jump to immediately backing the police on this one.. the man was a SCHOOL COOK who gave FREE food out to students who couldn't afford to pay for the food. SOUNDS LIKE A CRIMINAL TO ME! *rolls eyes*.. your ass better call somebody. not me though because it annoys the shit outta me to speak to you since ALL you do is COMPLAIN (and i told my psychologist that i was getting rid of all negativity starting last year i think?) and besides- you have never really been a role model to me like other daughters look up to their moms. my mom used ME as a SHIELD while my own dad was kicking her when i was an infant/younger girl! WHAT A ROLE MODEL! I'VE HAD AT LEAST TWO SURGERIES TO PROVE IT. ANYTHING she may have done for me was assisted to her by my grandparents. WHAT A GREAT PARENT. *rolls eyes* that is why you don't have kids if you can't take care of them.. i realize that she's a SINGLE PARENT (which also poses more responsibility- that's why my grandparents helped her raise me and my siblings). i know all this complaining about how shitty of a parent my mom was must bore the shit outta my nosey ass relatives who spy on me and think they're being secretive by reading my blog.. i got a solution for you- DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME READING IT ANYMORE SINCE YOU OBVIOUSLY HAVE CONTRADICTING THOUGHTS! *gasp* i had a suspicion i was the smart one of the family- EVEN if i DO stupid things with my intelligence. maybe i'm bored and i need to be somewhere that keeps me CONSTRUCTIVE and HAPPY?! by that i do NOT mean courage kenny. they either put me on a machine that my living room wall could operate or they just walk me up and down the halls LIKE I CAN (and DO walk EVERY single day in my own apartment for cheaper). i don't want ANYTHING to do with ignorant pricks who think they're better than anyone because they're different than them. even my boyfriend knew that i came from the ignorant part of the state because he said to me after he asked me where i grew up and i told him, he said, "oh.. you're from THAT area.." *covers head* yes.. i'm from THAT area. the bottom line is God created EVERYONE DIFFERENT SO WE'D BE UNIQUE IN OUR DIFFERENCES. i don't wanna talk to anyone who thinks differently. that includes my smart ass cousin who thought it was funny to make a joke about hanging n words when obama was made president on facebook. i'm never going to forget that shit. i lost ALL respect for dustin after that and guess what? IT'S NOT COMING BACK. especially NOT when i seem to be the subject of the conversation you share with amanda about me and how crazy i am, and how i'll never make it anywhere. RIGHT AMANDA? you're SUPPOSED to be SUPPORTIVE of me- that's why my grandma put YOU in charge of assisting me because she HOPED you'd have more knowledge than she did to get me to new york. she was getting old and tired which just made her more naive and she understood that- so she trusted her niece to HELP me get where I want to be in life since *GASP* THIS IS MY LIFE! she didn't have confidence in her own ability to get me living in new york safely.. AMANDA ISN'T CONCERNED ABOUT THAT THOUGH. IF IT DOESN'T HAVE TO DEAL DIRECTLY WITH HERSELF- TIME TO LAUGH AT STACY SARCASTICALLY BECAUSE EVEN IF SHE BUSTED HER ASS IN SCHOOL (I WAS AN HONORS STUDENT) IN 2 DIFFERENT SPORTS AND I DID TRY COLLEGE TWO OR THREE TIMES BUT AMANDA DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THAT BECAUSE IT'S EASIER FOR HER TO JUST LET THE COURAGE CENTER DEAL WITH ME SINCE I DO HAVE A TBI- SO I'M AUTOMATICALLY TOO DISABLED TO MAKE DECISIONS FOR MYSELF EVEN IF I HAVE WENT TO THE DAMN COURAGE CENTER FOR AT LEAST 4 OR 5 YEARS WITH THEM UNDERESTIMATING ME THE WHOLE TIME BECAUSE I'M THEIR DREAM COME TRUE- A TRULY MOTIVATED, UNADVOCATED FOR CLIENT! WE CAN JUST TELL HER SHE'S TOO STUPID TO DRIVE AND MAKE HER GO ON THE STUPID NU-STEP (WHICH DOES NOT HELP ME FOR SHIT). i even PAID for BEHIND-THE-WHEEL DRIVING LESSONS SINCE THAT'S WHAT THE DAMN COURAGE CENTER TOLD ME TO DO AND *GASP* THEY TOLD ME I WAS ABSOLUTELY SAFE TO DRIVE IF I GOT A VEHICLE TO TAKE THE BEHIND-THE-WHEEL DRIVER'S LICENSE TEST! IT'S LIKE EVERYONE WANTS TO STOP ME FROM DOING ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING EVEN IF I DO HAVE THE CAPABILITY TO DO THEM. COURAGE KENNY CAN KISS MY FUCKIN ASS. IF I GET FORCED TO GO THERE- I WILL ACT LIKE A MANIAC AND I GOT KICKED OUT OF MY PREVIOUS APARTMENT TO PROVE I'M CAPABLE OF IT. DON'T PUT SHIT PAST ME EVER.